Dear David,
Y o u a r e s o v e r y s l o w m y f r i e n d. I had hoped that by spacing it out and slowing it down for you you might be able to recognize your lack of proficiency when it comes to checking and responding to email. Perhaps you already know how unbelievably slow you are thanks to my previous email of yourself, your book, and the turtles. You still haven’t even finished the race in case you were wondering, nor your book. Actually a search party was released to find you both but they still have yet to. Where could you be?
Oh wait, what’s this? It looks like our friends Lucius and Barfelius found you! I told them about your lack of responses to my fabulous emails and the pathetic excuse you presented. They were so frustrated at how you would treat your greatest admirer and their best friend that they decided to teach you a lesson. They revived some of their gear from when they learned about Lucius’ Native American History and made a campfire. If you will note as I know it might take you come time to “catch up” and comprehend what is happening, Lucius is burning your book. It does pain me to see (don’t worry just in the top of my right foot) but I understand why he is doing it. Barfelius you will note is taking a very large dump on your photo. He ate a bunch of Taco Bell and boy did he have to go!
Oh wait, what’s this? It looks like our friends Lucius and Barfelius found you! I told them about your lack of responses to my fabulous emails and the pathetic excuse you presented. They were so frustrated at how you would treat your greatest admirer and their best friend that they decided to teach you a lesson. They revived some of their gear from when they learned about Lucius’ Native American History and made a campfire. If you will note as I know it might take you come time to “catch up” and comprehend what is happening, Lucius is burning your book. It does pain me to see (don’t worry just in the top of my right foot) but I understand why he is doing it. Barfelius you will note is taking a very large dump on your photo. He ate a bunch of Taco Bell and boy did he have to go!
Please send some Pepto Bismol if you have any…Barfelius really doesn’t feel well…now it’s just diarrhea all over your photo. And it’s projectile…hit your book as Lucius dropped it. :(
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